Friday, May 16, 2014

I can't see...

Today my best friend, Patricia and I were talking about our loved ones already with Jesus.  Patricia has a daughter, Anna, with Him.   My closest relative with Him is my mom.

It's hard when your loved one has been physically called away from the world. I know we still are connected because we are both children of God and therefore are part of one Body, His Body. 

I KNOW that but I can't see as Patricia sees. It's been 35 years since I last saw my mom.   She rocked me. She held me. She carried me in her body for 9 months. Trust me, grief over her sudden death at such a young age just about destroyed me for years. I got through the best I could. 

But I can't see (know, experience) the loss and grief Patricia goes through. She rocked Anna. She held Anna. She carried Anna in her body for 9 months. That grief and loss and despair has to be so different than any grief I went through- still go through- from time to time. 

Flesh of her flesh, bone of her bone. I can't imagine the ache not just in her heart but her arms. The ache of her eyes. The ache of her fingertips. The ache of her lips. The ache of her nose. The ache of a mother who on this life cannot hold or see or touch or kiss or smell her daughter. 

Does she sit quietly with You, Jesus and close her eyes and rest deep in her spirit where You are and because You are- Anna is- and hold her daughter?  Run her fingers through Anna's hair? Kiss her cheeks?  Bury her face in Anna's neck and smell her skin?

Does she get out of the temporal and seen and experience through You the eternal and unseen?  

I can't see as she sees. I can only see what has been shown to me. 

But Jesus, I see- 

For a mother whose child is not with her on this earth or a child whose mother is not with her on this earth- our blessings are different. 

Our blessings are seeing what You can and will do IN those that desire- yes, cannot even live without- You speaking truth and life and peace and eternal and unseen things into us. 

As we experience eternal life in you- Your riches - blessings- are poured into us. 

Even allowing us to SEE the ones we love that are in You. 

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