It's no secret....

It's no secret that I went through a lot in my childhood, teenage years and into my 20's.  The fact is, these days- most people do in their life.  

There are things that happen to you that you can't control.  And then there are decisions we make that definitely cause more grief and more despair.  

We weren't created to handle "these" things on our own.  The truth is WE CAN'T.  

I had NO idea how to deal with all the "feelings" I had.  Most of the time I couldn't express HOW or WHAT I was feeling and so my "feelings" and my lack of knowing how to deal with them- had results.  

The results for me personally were:

fear, anger, depression, control, manipulation

That's my personal "coping mechanisms"- patterns I formed or learned to deal with (the best I knew how) what I couldn't deal with.  

I was also on antidepressants for a long time.  They would help me "feel normal".  I depended on them also to help me cope with life.

My thoughts were based on past experiences and beliefs I held about myself.
My feelings were based on my thoughts.  
My actions were based on my feelings.     

But there came a time when God said to me, "I want to be the One to help you cope with life.  As a matter of fact, I don't want you to just cope I want you to live free and healed.  I sent my Son to bring about your freedom and real true life.  He did that for you.  He lives in you.   I want you to live your life like He lived His life- in complete dependence on Me.  I am Enough."

And you know- it was hard.  When He began to strip away all layers of protection I had built to cope, live, survive (never flourish, by the way)- it was tough.  But so healing.  So freeing.  So cleansing.  So whole.  So releasing. 

I was no longer chained down to my self.  I was no longer drowning in a pit of Starla.  I was no longer enslaved.  I was to be- the real me.  

Sometimes that fear, that anger, that control, that depression/oppression wants to take me back down- down-down- spiraling out of control.    

But Jesus.  Oh, but Jesus.  He says, "I've got you.  Do you believe/trust me?"

Romans 8- Who or what can EVER separate you from My love?
Colossians 1:17- I hold you together.
Hebrews 12:1-3  Lay aside all other ways of coping and fix your self on Me- and you won't grow weary and lose heart.
Hebrews 13:5 I will NEVER leave/desert or forsake you.  

You see, I don't WANT to cope any other way but in the Way.  I want to be healed.  I want to live free.  I don't want to act like that old dead me.  I want to be the alive me- the real me- the truest me.  I want to be me that Jesus lives His life in and through me-me.  

I want and choose victory. 

Some thoughts from Grace Life International in Charlotte, NC:
-our actions are usually based on our feelings
-our feelings are usually based on our thoughts
-our thoughts are based on our heart-level beliefs and past experiences
-to attempt to control behavior, feelings or thoughts WITHOUT changing the underlying belief system can be helpful for the short-term, but does not usually hold up over time
-when the underlying belief system is changed, our thoughts, feelings and actions are changed automatically

Romans 8: 1-17

 Therefore there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus.  For the law of the Spirit of life in Christ Jesus has set you free from the law of sin and of death.  For what the Law could not do, weak as it was through the flesh, God did: sending His own Son in the likeness of sinful flesh and as an offering for sin, He condemned sin in the flesh,  so that the requirement of the Law might be fulfilled in us, who do not walk according to the flesh but according to the Spirit.  For those who are according to the flesh set their minds on the things of the flesh, but those who are according to the Spirit, the things of the Spirit.  For the mind set on the flesh is death, but the mind set on the Spirit is life and peace,  because the mind set on the flesh is hostile toward God; for it does not subject itself to the law of God, for it is not even able to do so,  and those who are in the flesh cannot please God.

 
However, you are not in the flesh but in the Spirit, if indeed the Spirit of God dwells in you. But if anyone does not have the Spirit of Christ, he does not belong to Him.  If Christ is in you, though the body is dead because of sin, yet the spirit is alive because of righteousness.  But if the Spirit of Him who raised Jesus from the dead dwells in you, He who raised Christ Jesus from the dead will also give life to your mortal bodies through His Spirit who dwells in you.

 So then, brethren, we are under obligation, not to the flesh, to live according to the flesh—  for if you are living according to the flesh, you must die; but if by the Spirit you are putting to death the deeds of the body, you will live.  For all who are being led by the Spirit of God, these are sons of God.  For you have not received a spirit of slavery leading to fear again, but you have received a spirit of adoption as sons by which we cry out, “Abba! Father!” The Spirit Himself testifies with our spirit that we are children of God,  and if children, heirs also, heirs of God and fellow heirs with Christ, if indeed we suffer with Him so that we may also be glorified with Him.

A great big BLATANT NO!

Nick and I knew we were making the wrong choice on something.  We KNEW it.  And yet, we were going to do it anyway.  We tried forgetting about it.  We tried justifying it.  We tried every way we could to get away with it.

But...

Sometimes sometimes sometimes....God steps in and say, "Nope. No way. You are NOT going to make this choice. You are not going to go down that path. Yes, I know. It's easier right now to make that choice but in the long run it WILL cost you more- and as your Father I am stepping in and saying NO WAY."

Thank You, Father.

6 year running Anniversry!

Sebastian and I enjoyed our 6 mile 6 year anniversary run! 

 "Take it easy, take it easy"- Eagles. 

What kind of beginning doesn't really matter...it's the ending....

Just over a week ago we found out we were having a GRAND SON.  

It seems like yesterday that Nick and I were in a little room and on the screen was a little girl with wild hair!  But here we are- 26 years later- celebrating our little girl having a little boy!  Man, oh man, time sure flies!

As I was journaling, thinking and praying for our little Roman this morning the Lord poured His thoughts into my heart.

Little Roman sure has a good beginning!  A better beginning than I had.  A better beginning than Nick had.  This little boy has a head start!  Why do I say that?

Let me start at our beginning.

Nick and I met in high school.  He graduated in May of 1987.  I graduated in May of 1988.  We married on July 2, 1988.  We were barely 18 and 19.

Then we started our family: 
Allison Nichelle was born January 10, 1990  
Cody Aaron was born November 13, 1992 
Nicholas John Barry "Johnie" was born August 21, 1994

During this time we moved 325 miles from our family.  That was one of the hardest things I've ever done.  

When we first got married we went to church for a bit- and I was actually baptized- but I do not believe I was truly a believer.  I don't know.  Nothing changed within me.  Some people will say, "Well, you were saved you just didn't realize it."   But from the God I know now, that's just not how He works.  For when I became a believer- SOMETHING really did change- I knew it.  

In 2000, we had been married over 11.5 years when I became a believer.  The kids babysitter invited our children to church and I just couldn't let them go without me.  I wanted them to go and I was curious myself because my paternal grandparents were devout believers.  I KNEW they had something I didn't have- but the god I understood was a mean, "take away" god.  I didn't really want to believe in a god like that. (My mom went to church with my grandparents and I do believe she was saved but she was a new believer when she died and I was 9.  My dad although raised by loving, believing parents was not a believer.)

So on March 8, 2000 I knelt on my bedroom floor and asked Jesus to come into my heart.  Although I did not understand exactly what that meant.  I just knew that I believed in Him- really believed He is Who He says He is.  I didn't know what would change or life would be like after that but I was "compelled" to believe.  And I did.  I do.  

Within the year our children made "professions of faith".  Now, I say that because they were young- and I don't like to PUSH my children to make declarations they don't understand.  I just let God do His work (persuading) in them.  Faith means in it's truest sense of the word- "God's inward divine persuasion".  Jesus IS Faith.  He is the Author of Faith- He is the Finisher/Completer/Perfector of Faith.  Faith moves and grows- Jesus moves and grows within my children.

Throughout the years my children have found Jesus to be- true and real.  They are believers.  They are His children.  

In December of 2000 Nick believed and received Christ- and it was kind of funny.  I was on one phone in the house, Nick was on the other- and we were talking to our pastor and his wife who were also on separate phones at their house!  Nick invited Jesus into His heart- with all four of us on the phone!  

We were all 5 baptized together in January of 2001.

So- none of children were conceived when we were believers.  None of our children were prayed for before they were born or after for that matter- by us.  None of our children were dedicated to God.

And yet God- and but God....they are all now His.

But they sure didn't have a good beginning.  I didn't have a good beginning with neither of my parents believers (and yet, my mom became a believer before she died and my Dad received Christ almost 6 years ago).  Nick didn't have a good beginning.  

But Roman....has a good beginning.  He has parents who Christ lives within.  He has both sets of grandparents who Christ lives within.  He is prayed for- was prayed for before he was conceived.  He will be dedicated to God at our church.

And yet...Roman will have to choose to believe that Jesus is Who He says He is- and has done what He said He would do.  

He may have a better beginning than his mother..and his grandmother....and his great grandmother....but he will still have to choose to believe-

It doesn't really matter, I guess you could say, how we begin...it's how we

END.  

From Romans 10- The Message
(I just realized I picked a verses for Roman from Romans- after the letter he is named that Paul wrote to the people in Rome!  LOL)

   It’s the word of faith that welcomes God to go to work and set things right for us. This is the core of our preaching. Say the welcoming word to God—“Jesus is my Master”—embracing, body and soul, God’s work of doing in us what he did in raising Jesus from the dead. That’s it. You’re not “doing” anything; you’re simply calling out to God, trusting him to do it for you. That’s salvation. With your whole being you embrace God setting things right, and then you say it, right out loud: “God has set everything right between him and me!”

   Scripture reassures us, “No one who trusts God like this—heart and soul—will ever regret it.” It’s exactly the same no matter what a person’s religious background may be: the same God for all of us, acting the same incredibly generous way to everyone who calls out for help. “Everyone who calls, ‘Help, God!’ gets help.”
   But how can people call for help if they don’t know who to trust? And how can they know who to trust if they haven’t heard of the One who can be trusted? And how can they hear if nobody tells them? And how is anyone going to tell them, unless someone is sent to do it? That’s why Scripture exclaims,

A sight to take your breath away!
Grand processions of people telling all the good things of God!

Growing up and out!

When you are in the middle of raising your children you sometimes forget that time is passing. Your child is growing up- and out.

BE their parent now. That's your role and responsibility. We are growing them up into adults. Lord willing- they will adults a lot longer than they were children.

BE their parent in every phase. Enjoy them more. I feel like I didn't enjoy my children enough when they were young. (As a matter of fact it was when our kids entered youth group we really started enjoying them. Nick and I loved the youth group just as much as the kids!) It's hard being a parent. It's REALLY hard when you have no family around to support you, to guide you, to give you a helping hand occasionally. Living away from family you don't have the luxury of grandparents helping out-or aunts and uncles- or anyone for that matter. You learn to be a family and do everything together. To help each other. That's been our blessing of living far from family- we became a very close- knit little family of our own.

One thing I asked the Lord was to allow me to see my children fall in love. I want to see them be in love with the one they will marry. I have seen this with Allison and Ben (and now we get to see them extend and grow that love with Roman). Hopefully one day with the boys- but I don't want to rush them. I want them to live the life God has for them now...in this part of their life.

It's hard for one to leave the "nest" not just on you but on the one leaving. You may not think so- you may feel as if part of your life is over- and it is- but being a mother and friend to your child is not over. It's a new beginning. A new season in your relationship. A good and beautiful one.

A new relationship with new boundaries. And new freedoms.

So life doesn't end when your children grow up and out- THAT'S THE GOAL. That's what you raised them to do.

Laugh, hold them close, pray for them, pray with them, kiss them- even if they don't want you to.

: ) "Wherever you are- be all there."- Jim Eliot 

Click on link below to watch beautiful video-

 https://www.facebook.com/mariferduran/videos/10154605517058

Today's Agenda

This morning I ran 10.1 miles. It was a good run. Having some pain in my right foot. Hope to deal with that later. Sebastian ran 6.75 with me then I took him back to the house to finish the rest of the run. 

I don't think our yard will ever dry up!  It's been wet since the beginning of December. Ug!

Now I have a crown put on a tooth at 2pm. 

Yay me. 

Not.

Completing His faith and work- in me

Jesus is fully focused on perfecting our faith and completing the work He began (Philippians 1:6).

Read through the letters of the New Testament, and you will see this process taking place through the trials of life. Life on planet Earth is filled with trials and tribulations. They are constantly coming at us like waves to the shore. As Jesus said: "In this world you will have trouble" (John 16:33)

Even so, we can take heart. Jesus has overcome the world. Jesus is now living in us, and He teaches us how to abide in Him through the trials and tribulations of life. He is perfecting our faith.

James, Jesus's half brother, knew about trials and tribulations.  As the leader of the church in Jerusalem, he faced opposition from both the Romans and the Jews.  Out of that experience, he wrote, "Consider it pure joy, my bothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds." (James 1:1)

Each trial raises the question, is Jesus enough?  We're not always sure are we?  Sometimes we doubt and even worry that He will not be enough.  Time and time again, Jesus proves He is.  And each time He does, He moves our faith down the road to completion, as James discovered.  "You know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance.  Let perseverance finish it's work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking in anything." (verses 3-4)

-Bob Christopher Simple Gospel, Simply Grace

Which flower am I?

 
Your essence is similar in many respects to this beautiful flower. The sunshine brings out the best in you and makes you grow beyond your personal limits. Your gentle features underline your soft mind and let you flourish in the sunny rays of friendship. 

Jesus Is Our Life

Ransomed Heart

Jesus Is Our Life

 

 

We need Jesus like we need oxygen. Like we need water. Like the branch needs the vine. Jesus is not merely a figure for devotions. He is the missing essence of your existence. Whether we know it or not, we are desperate for Jesus.           

To have his life, joy, love, and presence cannot be compared. To know him as he is, is to come home. A true knowledge of Jesus is our greatest need and our greatest happiness. The purpose of your being here on this planet, at this moment in time, comes down to three things:

1. To love Jesus with all that is within you. This is the first and greatest command. Everything else flows from here.

2. To share your daily life with him; to let him be himself with you. On the beach, at supper, along the road—just as the disciples did.

3. To allow his life to fill yours, to heal and express itself through yours. There is no other way you can hope to live as he did and show him to others.

Love Jesus. Let him be himself with you. Allow his life to permeate yours. The fruit of this will be . . . breathtaking.

http://www.ransomedheart.com/daily-reading/jesus-our-life 

Makeovers!

I love the armoire....

http://www.goodhousekeeping.com/home/craft-ideas/g3093/furniture-makeovers/?slide=12

And the tub!

http://www.goodhousekeeping.com/home/craft-ideas/g3093/furniture-makeovers/?slide=10

Oh boy! He's a boy!

Our first grand child...coming summer 2016 is...

a BOY!!!

Honestly, I was SO shocked!  I honestly thought it was a girl but I am so very very pleased!

I mean, I have raised two sons : )  And they are pretty decent kids!

I have an AWESOME son-in-law!

Two other wonderful men are Nick and my Dad!

Yes, I have been blessed indeed by the men in my life...and now...a boy, a GRANDBOY!

The Lord, He is good!

Roman Michael Wofford (Well, the unannounced unofficial name)

Roman is our favorite "book" (actually a letter Paul wrote to the believers in Rome) of the Bible.

Michael is after Will Gunter, our kids youth pastor who also married Allison and Ben- they are still very good friends.  Michael is Will's first name.  (Michael is also my brother's name.  Nick's brother's name and Nick's stepdad's name.)

Roman comes from the meaning- to make strong, be strengthened
*probably from rhóomai (to move with speed)*
Definition
http://biblehub.com/greek/4514.htm
http://biblehub.com/greek/4516.htm
http://biblehub.com/greek/4517.htm
 
Michael  means "Who is like God?"
http://biblehub.com/hebrew/4317.htm

http://biblehub.com/greek/3413.htm

Girl or Boy?

Tonight we find out if Baby Wofford is a girl or a boy. It's hard to believe how in 24 weeks our lives and family dynamics will change. I am so very excited!

I really would love to have whatever God chooses to give Allison and Ben. Boy or girl- honestly it doesn't matter one iota to me.

I just can't wait to stomp through mudpuddles, eat fresh raspberries from the bush that came from Papa Cleary's farm and blow dandelion seeds into the wind.

What if she or he has my awful cowlick? I guess I'll lick my fingers and pat it down best I can. Or what if he or she has the sticky up hair Nick had when was young?

There are some traits a child will have ingrained in their being. Others...they will learn...and what example will we all be for she or he?

Matthew 19:13-14

Then some children were brought to Him so that He might lay His hands on them and pray; and the disciples rebuked them.

But Jesus said, “Let the children alone, and do not hinder them from coming to Me; for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these.”

This I know- I am Happy to be having a grandchild-how grand!

I am Happy to being one of the many that will speak Life (Jesus, John 14:6) into him or her.

Matthew 21:15-16 But when the chief priests and the scribes saw the wonderful things that He had done, and the children who were shouting in the temple, “Hosanna to the Son of David,” they became indignant and said to Him, “Do You hear what these children are saying?” And Jesus *said to them, “Yes; have you never read, ‘Out of the mouth of infants and nursing babies You have prepared praise for Yourself’?”

Snowing here....

I don't mind snow. I just don't like it when the ones I love most are going to have to drive in the snow. Snow is fine if everyone is at home, safe and sound.

Weekend Project- Cody's Bathroom

We built this bedroom and bathroom on our house in 2001 for Allison.  In 2012 when Allison married Ben, Cody inherited her room.  

I got to where I HATED the ceramic tile.  I am actually in this room a lot because I bathe the dogs in Cody's tub : ) (not mine!  LOL).  There was also a pedestal sink...which I hated.

So we found a linoleum we like.  I know.  I'm not usually a fan of linoleum but it's one piece and it's SO easy to clean!  I love the floor now.  I painted and Nick put a new sink/vanity in- also redid some plumbing.  

So...it's looks great...and clean!

My She Shed!!!!!

Thanks to Nick for his hard work!  We still have a few things to do.  New lights for the ceiling and fix the side door (I have a tarp and fabric over it now to keep the cold out)- and other odds and ends but the pallet walls and ceiling are finished, electricity and heat/air!  I've already made a friend a baby blanket!  : )

Hot Chocolate 5K/Crosland's Yellow Sub

So...I was going to run the Hot Chocolate 5K this weekend... Hot Chocolate 5K

But then I thought- am I really going to spend $27 to run when the Croslands REALLY need transportation???

So...my money is going to the Croslands- who are not only missionaries....but also my brothers/sisters in Christ and my friends!

Can you help?
 
Croslands Yellow Sub!

 

New do!

I really hate posting pics of myself but I wanted to post my new do!

I was so so so tired of my hair. Ug. Really. Ug. 

So...

And when you pray.....

Abiding Life Ministries International

The simple question occurs to us from time to time: If God knows what I need before I ask, and His will is going to be accomplished,then why should I even pray? Well, let us look at the facts. God is very comfortable with His will; it is a perfectly beautiful thing to every child of His. However, the more I focus on things of this earth and not the things of God, the more uncomfortable with His will I become and the more I must attempt to play God, for though I have God, I am living as though I do not. As I look at Him from a self-imposed distance, I become increasingly leery of His plans. What He is doing makes very little sense. In the end, I will come up with all sorts of anxiety-laden proposals for my life. The secret is that prayer is not primarily for changing the will of God but to make us comfortable with His will! As we acknowledge His nearness to us, His love, voice, and care will be experienced. Remember, it is unbelief to think we ever have to move into the presence of God, for we constantly live in His presence. However, we sometimes act like children confined to a very small room, and though the Father is near, we stand aloof, facing the corner with our backs to Him. As we experience the character of God in prayer, we can shout, “Thy will be done!” We see there could be nothing better than His will! We want it, we pray for it, we want it for others, and we are comfortable.
--Mike Wells My Weakness For His Strength

Lead me, Lord

"Lord, teach me to abide in You and to follow the leading of Your Spirit in my life."

You can count on this- God's Spirit will never lead you into sin.  He leads you in all truth.  He leads you down the paths of righteousness.  He leads you to love and to serve others.  This life of faith is simply ordering everything that you are and do around the work of God's Spirit in your life.  Peter put it this way:

"His divine power has given us everything we need for a godly life through our knowledge of Him who called us by His own glory and goodness.  Through these He has give us His very great and precious promises, so that through them you may participate in the divine nature, have escaped the corruption of the world caused by evil desires." 2 Peter 1:3-4

Living by the Spirit is trusting God to complete the work He began in you.  You can count on Him to complete this task even though you don't always cooperate.

-Bob Christopher, Simple Gospel Simply Grace

Half half!

I ran a half half marathon this morning...

A quarter of marathon?  Lol

Well 6.55 miles and boy it was cold. 25 degrees. The high is only 37 right now and it's 4:30pm. 

And it was quite windy in some spots but Sebastian and I had a good run. He's such a good runner dog!

America and 1st Amendment

Makes me very thankful to live in America and for our 1st Amendment.

Saudis arrest sister of blogger lashed for insulting the kingdom | Fox News

Human rights groups and activists say one of Saudi Arabia's most prominent human rights advocates has been arrested.

foxnews.com

March 26, 2016 13.1 miles through lovely Spartanburg!

iRecycle Half Marathon

Spartanburg High School
500 Dupre Drive
Spartanburg SC 29307

Date: 03/26/16
Time: 08:00 AM

Participant List (25)

$43.19
(includes 3.19 processing fee)

Closes March 24, 2016, 8:59 p.m.

 

iRecycle 5K
Participant List (4)

$22.09
(includes 2.09 processing fee)

 

Closes March 24, 2016, 8:59 p.m.

 

Event Director Info

Brandy Gutierrez
iRecycle
Spartanburg, SC 29302
864-381-0996

The seventh annual iRecycle Half Marathon and 5K run will take place on Saturday, March 26, 2016 in Spartanburg, S.C. and will take participants through some of the most beautiful areas of Spartanburg! Proceeds from the run will be used to award iRecycle scholarships to area high school students who actively participate in school and community recycling programs.

 

The route for the 5K may be found here: http://ridewithgps.com/routes/1418298 .

The half marathon course is here: http://ridewithgps.com/routes/1714010

 

 

The half marathon starts at 8 a.m. and the 5K starts at 8:15 a.m.

 

 
Our History
In the spring of 2008, URRC and Spartanburg Coca-Cola distributors partnered together to launch iRecycle, an innovative recycling program in Spartanburg County Schools. URRC provides recycling bins and other promotional supplies to increase student awareness and participation in recycling. Coca-Cola then collects the full bin as they deliver their products to the schools.

The program has been a tremendous success and continues to expand! iRecycle now operates in schools and businesses throughout the upstate and has collected over 3 million plastic bottles! This has saved 655 cubic yards of landfill space. In 2012, $7250 in scholarships were awarded to graduating high school seniors for their dedication to recycling. Our goal, with the help of this race, is to continue to grow the scholarship program and educate our youth on the impact they can have on our environment and our community by recycling.

This year, iRecycle started a partnership with The Hope Center for Children. Through an educational grant, The Hope Center was able to purchase 14 laptop cases.  The iRecycle Fund plans to provide on-going assistance for The Hope Center for Children’s educational needs.

Packet Pickup:

Packet pick-up will be from 5:30 - 7 p.m., Friday, March 25, at Academy Sports + Outdoors, 100 Peachwood Centre Drive in Spartanburg and at Spartanburg High School, 500 Dupre Drive in Spartanburg, from 6:30-7:45 a.m. on race day.

Website:

http://www.irecycledoyou.net

 

Copy and Paste this link into an email and invite your friends: