You
know, I am pretty proud of my kids. There were times I was told I was
too hard on them. And- I was. When God began to speak His grace and
love into me 6 years ago, I really began to change on the inside and I
began to teach and treat my children different because I was different
on the inside. I was 38 and had already been a Christian for 8 years.
(Goes to show you can be a "good" Christian and still not let God change
YOU (as He wants to change you) from the inside out- until you come to
the end of your self.)
But I look at my kids- my imperfect kids- and realize, WOW they are only 20, 22 and 24 and they know Jesus in a way I never even thought about at their age. They are more "put together" than I ever was. They are more aware than I ever was. Who do I give this credit to? Certainly not me- me who was so crazy chaotic on the inside for so many years. I do give some to Nick, he's always been so steady! But the One Who really deserves all the credit? God.
My children are going to have children some day- and face WAY more challenges than we did as a parent but they have something we didn't- Jesus, Who is their Life and lives within them. They have the Father, Who is their ultimate Parent. They have the Spirit, Who is their Counselor and Teacher.
I have to say, the best thing Nick and I ever did was be very involved WITH our teens in the youth group. They had a wonderful youth pastor with whom they are still close friends with today. Nick and I are still close friends with him! Our philosophy was this, "Yes, the "rocking" youth group is fun. Yes, the "active" youth group is fun. Yes, "sports" are fun. Yes, all the "extra curricular" activities are fun. Yes, "going out with friends" is fun. There is SO much fun! But what's the most important thing? When our kids are in their 20's, 30's, 40's and beyond- what happens when all the "fun" is gone and life gets hard and monotonous? Did they learn Who God really is? Do they know who He created them to be? Do they trust Him? Have intimacy with Him? Are they extending His love, joy, peace, grace and kindness to others? Is this what they are being taught by us and our church leaders?"
Maybe Nick and I had an advantage. Maybe our messy lives before Christ made us realize what IS most important- Jesus. We knew that life wasn't fair, it wasn't perfect, it wouldn't always work out like we wanted it to. We also knew that filling our kids up with "candy" would not satisfy them and eventually make them sick. They are "meat and potatoes" kind of kids!
When I look back I do have regrets as a parent and a believer. I would have focused our family more on knowing Christ intimately, of truly being His body on this earth- serving others through love, friendship, kindness and grace. I would have been more supportive of how God wanted to express Himself through each of them, uniquely. I would tell my kids- constantly- who they are in Christ. Loved, holy, righteous, saints, forgiven, complete, accepted, secure, significant, His child, His friend, inheritor, united with Him, redeemed, salt, light, a branch, His temple, a vessel, seated with Him in the heavenlies, hidden in Him- and always direct access to Him (you can't get any closer, He lives IN your new heart and new spirit!).
To sum it all up, someday my children- and yours- are going to go through things so hard, so devastating, so LIFE. Where do you want them to turn in those times? Nothing. No one. Can truly meet their inner needs except God. Only He can give them real and true and lasting Peace. Joy. Love. Life. Because that's Who He is. He can be Himself in them.
But I look at my kids- my imperfect kids- and realize, WOW they are only 20, 22 and 24 and they know Jesus in a way I never even thought about at their age. They are more "put together" than I ever was. They are more aware than I ever was. Who do I give this credit to? Certainly not me- me who was so crazy chaotic on the inside for so many years. I do give some to Nick, he's always been so steady! But the One Who really deserves all the credit? God.
My children are going to have children some day- and face WAY more challenges than we did as a parent but they have something we didn't- Jesus, Who is their Life and lives within them. They have the Father, Who is their ultimate Parent. They have the Spirit, Who is their Counselor and Teacher.
I have to say, the best thing Nick and I ever did was be very involved WITH our teens in the youth group. They had a wonderful youth pastor with whom they are still close friends with today. Nick and I are still close friends with him! Our philosophy was this, "Yes, the "rocking" youth group is fun. Yes, the "active" youth group is fun. Yes, "sports" are fun. Yes, all the "extra curricular" activities are fun. Yes, "going out with friends" is fun. There is SO much fun! But what's the most important thing? When our kids are in their 20's, 30's, 40's and beyond- what happens when all the "fun" is gone and life gets hard and monotonous? Did they learn Who God really is? Do they know who He created them to be? Do they trust Him? Have intimacy with Him? Are they extending His love, joy, peace, grace and kindness to others? Is this what they are being taught by us and our church leaders?"
Maybe Nick and I had an advantage. Maybe our messy lives before Christ made us realize what IS most important- Jesus. We knew that life wasn't fair, it wasn't perfect, it wouldn't always work out like we wanted it to. We also knew that filling our kids up with "candy" would not satisfy them and eventually make them sick. They are "meat and potatoes" kind of kids!
When I look back I do have regrets as a parent and a believer. I would have focused our family more on knowing Christ intimately, of truly being His body on this earth- serving others through love, friendship, kindness and grace. I would have been more supportive of how God wanted to express Himself through each of them, uniquely. I would tell my kids- constantly- who they are in Christ. Loved, holy, righteous, saints, forgiven, complete, accepted, secure, significant, His child, His friend, inheritor, united with Him, redeemed, salt, light, a branch, His temple, a vessel, seated with Him in the heavenlies, hidden in Him- and always direct access to Him (you can't get any closer, He lives IN your new heart and new spirit!).
To sum it all up, someday my children- and yours- are going to go through things so hard, so devastating, so LIFE. Where do you want them to turn in those times? Nothing. No one. Can truly meet their inner needs except God. Only He can give them real and true and lasting Peace. Joy. Love. Life. Because that's Who He is. He can be Himself in them.
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