My beloved grandfather, John Cleary

You know, we have all faced tragedy in our lives. Some may have faced it young, others as adults. Something dark and despairing. Something that may have left us groping, searching for years for peace- for truth. Something to not just take away the hurt and pain but to heal us from the inside out. 

My grandfather, John Cleary was such a man. In his 20's- the 1920's- his wife and two children- his first son and daughter- all died of an illness. I can't imagine the profound grief- aching, throbbing, deep grief he went through. 

I wonder did he question God? Did he sink deep into his despair and grief for a time? Did he allow doubt and questions of God's goodness and love to fill his mind and heart?

I do not know. But, I do know some things. I do not know when or how or where but I KNOW He chose to trust and believe God- in a deeper and more intimate way than he had before he lost his wife and children. How do I know that? Well, he went on to marry my grandmother, Betha, and have 8 children.

He could have said, "I can't and won't trust God! I will never love again! I will never let my heart be so shattered again!" But he didn't.

He turned to Jesus and let Jesus heal him. He let Jesus fill his weak and worn soul. He let Jesus strengthen and expand his spirit to real, true life. Christ became his Center. He chose to live fully the life God had given him.

And years later, when his beloved daughter Ruth died of cancer- he held as tightly as ever to his trustworthy God.

And years after that when his daughter-in-law died after a drunk driver hit their car and left his son and grandchildren torn and wounded- he prayed over them for the peace and healing of his beloved Jesus- to fill them with His Peace and Healing.

I am the fruit of my grandfather choice to trust and believe God. I am the fruit of the prayers in intimacy and communion with Jesus.

And I can say, like my beloved Grandpa Cleary-

Psalm 23
23 The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want.

2 He maketh me to lie down in green pastures: he leadeth me beside the still waters.

3 He restoreth my soul: he leadeth me in the paths of righteousness for his name's sake.

4 Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for thou art with me; thy rod and thy staff they comfort me.

5 Thou preparest a table before me in the presence of mine enemies: thou anointest my head with oil; my cup runneth over.

6 Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life: and I will dwell in the house of the Lord for ever.