Homeless

There's not too much that is more sad than a chronically homeless older sister.  My sister, M, is 8 years older than me- she is 54.  I am not going to go into the sad details of her life but here she is- all alone at 54.  Burned every single bridge behind her.

My two older sisters have tried to help her by allowing her to live with them for short periods.  It truly was a disaster and nearly drove one sister to the end of her rope.  She almost destroyed the other sisters marriage.  My younger sister and I will not allow her to live with us.  

As believers, and we have this commandment from Jesus, "love your neighbor as your self"- how do you love your older, homeless sister that has mental and emotional issues, cannot work, can be violent, who lives in constant inner and outer chaos, has problems with drugs, who is loud and abrasive, who cannot be trusted- how do we love her as we love ourself?

I wish someone would tell me.  Because I don't know.  

She called and left a message at 11am last night.  "Someone come and get me.  Someone take care of me."

But she refuses to take care of herself.  She refuses to help herself.  She wants to live with someone.  Someone take care of her.  Give her cigarettes, soda, food, a comfy home, run her around- she wants to work the system.   

I can't do it.  And it makes me feel terrible.   

I just don't know what to do.

I'm going to call the YWCA in Columbus, Ohio.  Try to somehow get her somewhere to where she can get some sort of help.  But I'm 10 hours away.  And to be honest, I'm not sure what I would do if I were closer.  

My friend, Scott says, "I'll be there for you but I won't go there for you."   My sister drags me down a pit.  She feels me with despair, fear (not for myself but for a more and more of this same old stuff with her), deep sadness (for a life wasted)- so many things.  She has 5 children and doesn't have a relationship with any of them.  Many of them are on drugs and have spent time in jail also, who have children that they do not raise or care for, don't work= plays the system.  It's all so heartbreaking sad.

I thank God.  I truly do.  I, too, could have just as easily went down that path.  I thank God for Nick.  A man that loves me and provides for me- emotionally, physically, financially, spiritually- in all ways.  I truly am blessed.  I wouldn't be where I am without Nick.  I thank God for His provision, loving care and kindness.  

So what's the difference?  Why did her life go her path?  The same reason Adam and Eve's path went the way it did and now we are all born on that path.  They wanted to do it their own way, be independent.  And that is my sister.  She always rebuked authority.  She always, still does- and tries in any way she can to drag others down her path, she wants her own way.  

I am so thankful, Jesus- that You came and provided, through your blood and body, Your surrender of  Yourself, Your yielding to the Father- You provided through Your death, burial, resurrection, ascension, and even seating at the right hand of God- You provided for ME- and even my sister ANOTHER WAY- the only Way to real, true Life, Peace, Joy, Contentment, Forgiveness- and so much more!  Oh Jesus, I choose You.  I choose Your way.  Not mine.  

That's my prayer for my sister, and all of my family.  For those of us that are believers, to daily choose His way and not mine.  To abide.  To rest.  To have intimacy.  To have continual fellowship.  Which results going His way....and not mine.  

So, Lord, guide me in to the way I should go with my sister.  I know You love her.  I know You died and rose again- shed Your precious blood, surrendered Your body and life- so we can receive all Your riches and inheritances.  Grace.  Mercy.  Peace with You.  Forgiveness.  Life and godliness.  

May I live and walk in the truth that YOU live in me.  You guide me.  You are my Life.  

Amen.